There is a quiet in the house. I wrap that quiet around me and settle onto the couch. A summer breeze of fresh-mown lawns and sunshine tickles my skin through the open window.
What a difference a week can make. (Technically more than a week since that post.) I am more calm. I am more relaxed. I have less anger. And less emotional instability. It is still early, this I know, but there is a hope within me that has been lit anew. A flickering candle that I know can grow into a fire (the good kind) in my soul, if given the right kindling.
A month ago I was on the edge. Self-doubt and disappointment crumbling the ground beneath me. Fatigue, beating me down. All of it snuffing out my flame. Making me feel like a failure.
But I am not a failure. I am a warrior. I am a mother. And I am doing a good job.
These thoughts, these beliefs, they surround me. A layer of protection against myself. And with that, I gather the girls to feel summer on our cheeks. To run around outside, our bare toes in the grass.